I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
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Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
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I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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