Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
