Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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