Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
soo... how was my night?
Randomize
