Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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