Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
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Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
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Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
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