just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
