guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
