Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
