I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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