Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
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