; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
