Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Randomize