The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
Randomize
