just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
tell me about the eggs
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