You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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