She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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