i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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