And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize