of course. lets lasso hookers.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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