Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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