we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Randomize