I have demons in me.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
there is glitter all over my balls
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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