my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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