return my video game
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
