So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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