as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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