What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
time to smoke my breakfast
nutella sex= disaster
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
