I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Randomize
