I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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