His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I pour the whiskey from now on
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize