So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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