Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
