I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
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Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
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