i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
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