dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
