Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
