Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
