he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Everclear isn't food dammit
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize