she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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