is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
