This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
