i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize