I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
i already hear my dad disowning me
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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