I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
