If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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