I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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