At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
