They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Randomize
