She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
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I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
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He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
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