in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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